And that's always be enough for me

I live in my small secured world. My little world is spinning around family and work. I live ordinary daily life, do ordinary things. I always hide inside this comfort cavern of mine, doing anything simple as long as it can makes me content.

You might think that my life is a bore. But truthfully, all the things I've ever needed is served in a platter in front of me. I have a family, not a big one, only one little family in our secluded home, but for me that's always be enough because all of us love each other enormously. I have few friends I dare to called as bestfriend. Some of them aren't here but enough for me to know we love each other and we have each other and we care for each other and we understand each other. We might not have 'stick-like-a-tattoo' kind of friendship, but for me that always be enough to know they're always there for me in the happiest time and the saddest time of my life. I may not have boyfriend to share love story together but I do have my whole self to share love with anyone happen to be in my side.

Yes, I'm one of the girl you might call as lucky. I'm lucky. All of my life, God put everything in order to make one great plan for me. At this time, I really don't know what the plan is. And I'm pretty sure tomorrow I still won't know the plan too. But not knowing is enough for me, because who am I to understand God's plan. It's enough to know that He always answer my pray in the right time.

It's not that I never encounter bad things or never being hurt or anything. Of course I experienced some bitter time too. All of bitter memories in my life, all of disappointment, all of the tears wasted and the hurt marked in my heart, all of miseries I feel, all of loneliness eating me inside, all of bad feelings and emotions I have inside me.

I don't know how many times I kneel on the floor, crying to Him to give me strength. I don't know how many times I curse my life and pour all my mind to Him. But really, God is great, because He always forgive me. The most important thing is, He always accept me no matter how bad my behavior was. He blessed me with His love, His protection, and His grace.

It take times to get the bigger picture of God's plan for me. Usually I'll get it in later time. He really give me temptation in the first place to blessed me with wonderful miracles later. And I always feel grateful for that.

That's why I called myself lucky, because in every life corner, I always get a chance to feel grateful. Lucky to be blessed. Lucky to have everything I have now. My life isn't the perfect one, but for me that's always be enough.

Enough as long as I have someone to hugs me when I'm down. Enough as long as I have someone to stand behind me and fight with me. Enough as long as I have someone to hear me whine. Enough to have someone to scold me in my bad times. Enough to have someone to share laugh with. Enough to have someone to care about me. Enough to live my life every shitty day.

I'm not the most beautiful girl nor the smartest one. I'm not the most popular one nor the richest one. I'm not the tallest one or the shortest one. I'm not the fattest one nor the slimmest one. I'm just ordinary girl. My life is one normal daily life. I'm not a nobel achiever or the greatest designer. I'm just the girl next door. I'm one of the luckily simple normal girl.

Except that I have love so much to share inside of me. I have nothing, nothing except love to give. And I always do that wholeheartedly. And that's always be enough for me.

That's why I called myself as lucky. Lucky because I still can feel that this is enough and I still feel grateful for all the wonderful things in my life. Lucky because I still have love inside of me to share.

Sincerely yours :)


"I know we're all afraid
Someday, somebody's gonna take the stand
Someday, somebody's gonna say enough
This could be that day
Trust your senses
And don't look that bitch in the eyes"
by: Perseus from: Clash of The Titans