Stressful Wedding

Lately, talking about wedding and married with my friend is kinda exciting, plus confusing. Yeah, wedding can be quite stressful. Imagine that you need to prepare one big ceremony and one big party for once in a lifetime plus you need to prepare your mental. You need to think about the day and thousand problems in it. You need to think about a place to live after that. You need to think about your parents. You need to think about family, because you’re going to combine two family (big or no). And the most stressful of all, you need to think about your adaptation and obligation.

Despite what do you think, I always think that family matter most in a wedding. Because when you marry, you also marry the family. If they’re not going well together, your life will be a hell. Well, maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe not in hell, but at least you’re going to be miserable enough.

As a Chinese, usually we always have an extra big family. All of them want to know everything and all of them want to help anything. The problem is, too much info and help won’t do any good at all, not in your wedding, not in your marriage.

If we compare ourself to westerners, maybe some of their culture makes good senses. Example, westerners usually life separated with their parents, right after they’re mature enough. That means they’re independent enough to live separate with their parents. That means that they don’t have to worry much about parents in their married life, at least at early married life. I’m not saying that parents are disturbing, not that. I mean, married lives need some adaptation for both husband and wife, not to talk about adaptation for parents. Living together with parents under one roof means too much husbands or too much wives. It’s hard enough to adapting your partner, not to say about parents or someone else.

Another example, westerners tend to live together before they’re getting married. It helps a lot for adapting the habits. At least after that there won’t be much surprise for both of them.

I’m not saying that ‘this is right’ or ‘this is wrong’ okay. Some of eastern culture thinks that western culture is absurd, and vice versa of course. I’m not giving opinion, just comparing some facts based on western and eastern culture. About which culture you’re going to choose, that’s your problem. I believe everyone have their own way and their own beliefs.

Just remember one thing, no matter how stressful your wedding preparation is, you need to enjoy it. It’s happen only once in a lifetime (I hope). And I believe that we need to build the connection and we need to walk the memory, so you’ll have something to remember and something to hold on for the rest of your life.

Happy loving!